Most of the stand-up comedians on TV piss me off...
Here's a simple self-explanatory synopsis:
Hello, I'm a Comedian. I hate my life and I suck at relationships. *laughter* I love women but they are evil. *laughter* I hate sharing but I'm married. *laughter* I should be telling a story now, where I mention an inside joke. Then, I'll talk about a few other things, and after a certain time, I'll refer to the inside joke again. This always gets me the biggest laughs and applause, cuz people get to show they were paying attention, proving how good a children they are. *laughter* I'm not a father figure. My dad used to beat me up, but he was a good parent. *laughter* Almost as good as embedding the previous inside joke again. *laughter and applause* Now let's talk about politics... John Mccain. *laughter* Barack Obama. *laughter* Alright, that brought a few laughs. Let's move on... Nine Eleven. *laughter* Now that was funny because you thought I was gonna change the topic. Seriously, though, as much as I hate the government, I love that country, man, and I think we should all support our troops in Iraq. God bless America! *cheers and applause* Well, that's my time, everybody! I hate myself! You're all a bunch of niggers. Fuck you! *cheers and applause*
