In this post, I claim that if you are not satisfied with your current friends, you have to ditch them in order to find better ones. Well, I don't think so anymore, and here is why...
Because humans are social animals, it would be irrational for one to choose loneliness over virtue. A rational human being would always seek to satisfy their human needs. When you try to ignore your needs, you are trying to be more than human; you are ignoring your genetic limitations. You become a believer, and you are no better than a religious person. When you begin to value virtue more than you value yourself, you become an idealist. Moral standards are there to help you pick who to associate with. Moral standards are there to help you socialize. If they become a handicap to your social life, they are no longer serving their purpose, but rather working against it. It's like a person whose knowledge of nutrition is making him starve to death.
If you can't get what you want, you can at least settle for what's best on the market. You don't have to lower your moral standards in order to have friends; just keep a clear mind, always be on the lookout for someone better. Don't try to fool yourself that your flawed friends are perfect; be aware of their moral flaws, be honest about your fundamental disagreements with them. That way you won't get trapped in a Master-Slave relationship.
If you state your preferences and you're clear about what you like and dislike about each other, you're going to have a stress-free relationship with that person. Sometimes new friends are not compatible with old friends. If you can't have both at the same time, then prioritize. It doesn't matter how long you've been friends for. You don't say that about your old TV when you buy a new flat-screen HDTV. Keep sentimentality out of the way, look for value. Who is more valuable to you? Whose company do you enjoy more? Who do you feel more comfortable with? Who provides more predictability to you? If you find yourself torn between two (groups of) people, you'd better make that choice and reject one side. The choice should be between your current friends and new people, not between the former and loneliness.
Oct 9, 2009
Oct 1, 2009
Finally Free
This is it! I am finally living the dream.
I'm independent, I pay cheap rent, and I eat great food.
How did I achieve this? Integrity.
My mother believes in magic. When two people are related, she believes that they magically love each other, no matter how much they differ. So I used that against her. I said to her, "You're my mom, therefore you should love me". The truth of the matter is, my mother and I disagree on fundamental principles. If anything, we should hate each other. So why the fuck did I want to depend on someone who's supposed to hate me? Remaining in the "son" position meant that I had to be a slave and constantly manipulate her in order to get what I want.
Property is that which is under one's control. When you surrender your responsibilities to somebody else, you become their property, because they have control over your life. Children are property of their parents. I wrote a Family Manifesto long time ago, where I claimed that parents are obligated to take care of and share property with their children. How manipulative of me. Who's to say that one shouldn't abandon their property?
Children remain property until one of the following things occurs:
1. They acquire enough experience and skills to take care of themselves.
2. They choose to abandon their parents.
3. Their parents choose to abandon them.
You'll never guess what I did. It's the best choice I've ever made. I decided to become my mother's employee. My job? I'm a domestic worker. Where do I live now? I am my mother's roommate. I live in the living room, I sleep on the couch. The rent is cheap, it's covered by my wage. And so is the food. I no longer depend on my mother's benevolence, and I don't have to manipulate her anymore. Instead, I just have to complete the tasks in my daily planner. My work schedule? 3 hours a day, at most. I feel so much more confident and independent. No more pressure to find a job. No more feeling like a fuckup. Now I live with integrity. I am finally my own.
I'm independent, I pay cheap rent, and I eat great food.
How did I achieve this? Integrity.
My mother believes in magic. When two people are related, she believes that they magically love each other, no matter how much they differ. So I used that against her. I said to her, "You're my mom, therefore you should love me". The truth of the matter is, my mother and I disagree on fundamental principles. If anything, we should hate each other. So why the fuck did I want to depend on someone who's supposed to hate me? Remaining in the "son" position meant that I had to be a slave and constantly manipulate her in order to get what I want.
Property is that which is under one's control. When you surrender your responsibilities to somebody else, you become their property, because they have control over your life. Children are property of their parents. I wrote a Family Manifesto long time ago, where I claimed that parents are obligated to take care of and share property with their children. How manipulative of me. Who's to say that one shouldn't abandon their property?
Children remain property until one of the following things occurs:
1. They acquire enough experience and skills to take care of themselves.
2. They choose to abandon their parents.
3. Their parents choose to abandon them.
You'll never guess what I did. It's the best choice I've ever made. I decided to become my mother's employee. My job? I'm a domestic worker. Where do I live now? I am my mother's roommate. I live in the living room, I sleep on the couch. The rent is cheap, it's covered by my wage. And so is the food. I no longer depend on my mother's benevolence, and I don't have to manipulate her anymore. Instead, I just have to complete the tasks in my daily planner. My work schedule? 3 hours a day, at most. I feel so much more confident and independent. No more pressure to find a job. No more feeling like a fuckup. Now I live with integrity. I am finally my own.
Feature:
Mind Exploration,
Society
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