A bunch of questions from a virgin:
Why do you always have to look at women as potential sexual partners? Let's say you have a girlfriend and you guys decide to break up, but stay friends. How do you stay friends with a chick who you've never been friends with? Why would you wanna stay friends with somebody you've broken up with? Can you break up with a friend? Is sexual intimacy something independent of friendliness? Isn't your girlfriend supposed to be your best friend, too? What if you have a female best friend who you're not intimate with? Would mating with another girl be fair? Is sex a reward? The tip of a good friendship? Or is it something entirely independent of friendly exchanges? I know it comes down to brain chemicals. But what triggers these chemicals, besides physical attractiveness? Isn't hiding your real self from your girlfriend equivalent to being pussy-whipped?
I don't know man, shit is so fucked up and confusing. It starts out with stereotypes and taboos and goes all the way up to this mess. I believe that if we took all these out, sex could be more like playing a game with your best friends, and not the sole purpose of having a good relationship with a member of the opposite gender. I don't know, these are just some ignorant embarrassing speculations. I'd like to be better educated on this topic, but I'm almost sure there are like a thousand different theories.
A friend of mine helped me realize that I have a bit unrealistic standards. That's why I don't understand the friend-to-girlfriend transformation. I was asked about my sexual fantasies so I found out that I would only be comfortable to engage in an intimate relationship with a woman like the fictional character Maude Lebowski: care-free, no issues, no sentimentality, just completely honest and content with her own nature. Women like that don't exist. Some create the impression that they are such, but the more you get to know them, the more you hear about their issues, taboos, and insecurities. So that's why the friendlier a relationship becomes, the less sexually appealing a woman would appear to me. And it's unfair of me to have such standards for females, because I myself have my own issues to deal with.
